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Leaderhip

When You’re the First or the Only: Thriving as a Trailblazer in Government: Stories and Strategies for Leading When no one Looks Like You

There’s a moment in almost every woman’s career in government when she walks into a room, scans the crowd, and realizes something quietly profound: I’m the only one here. The only woman. The only person of color. The youngest voice. The first of her kind in a long line of men in suits.

It’s exhilarating. It’s terrifying. And it’s lonely.

But if you’ve felt that moment—or you’re living it now—this post is for you. You’re not alone, even when it feels like you are.

The Burden of the “First”

Being the first or only isn’t just about cracking glass ceilings. It’s about living under the constant pressure to be perfect, to represent everyone who looks like you, and to prove—over and over—that you belong.

Trailblazing often comes with:

  • Isolation – No one to confide in who shares your lived experience.
  • Imposter Syndrome – The fear that someone made a mistake letting you in the room.
  • Overwork – The unspoken (and sometimes spoken) expectation that you have to work twice as hard to earn half the credit.
  • Representation Fatigue – Feeling like you’re expected to speak for all women, or all Latinas, or all Black women, or all LGBTQ+ people instead of just leading as you.

But here’s the truth: Trailblazers don’t walk easy roads. They walk necessary ones. And when they do, they carve space for others to follow.

Women Who Led Anyway

Madeleine Albright

When she became the first female Secretary of State, Albright didn’t just break a barrier—she redecorated the room. She famously said, “There is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women.” But she also admitted to the burden of being a diplomatic pioneer while managing her identity as a woman in a male-dominated arena.

Mary McLeod Bethune

As an advisor to FDR and the only Black woman at the table, Bethune used her position to open doors for thousands. She founded the National Council of Negro Women and famously said, “I leave you hope.” But before that, she faced ridicule, dismissal, and exclusion. She kept going anyway—anchored by a belief that representation is not just a symbol, but a strategy.

Carol Moseley Braun

When she took her seat as the first Black woman elected to the U.S. Senate, she carried a triple burden: race, gender, and high expectations. She faced aggressive scrutiny from the press and her peers. And yet, she stayed grounded in her mission: “I’m not representing a race or a gender. I’m representing ideas.”

Hallie Caraway

At just 25, Caraway became the youngest person and first Black woman to chair the Alaska State Commission for Human Rights. Her youth and race were often questioned—but she turned criticism into momentum, proving that conviction matters more than conformity.

Frances Perkins

The first woman to serve in a presidential cabinet (as Secretary of Labor under FDR), Perkins only accepted the job after FDR promised to back her sweeping reforms. She walked into rooms where no woman had ever been invited—and left with the New Deal in her wake. But her legacy was hard-earned; she was often dismissed as “too ambitious.”

Elaine Chao

As the first Asian American woman appointed to a cabinet position, Chao navigated cultural expectations, public scrutiny, and political complexity with stoic determination. Her presence in the cabinet proved that Asian American women belong in the halls of power—even if few had walked those halls before her.

Sandra Day O’Connor

The first woman on the Supreme Court knew the weight of being “the first.” She once said, “The power I exert on the court depends on the power of my arguments, not my gender.” Still, she faced skepticism, sexist commentary, and even the assumption she was someone’s secretary—until she opened her mouth and delivered rulings that shaped the nation.

Hillary Clinton

Whether you love her or not, Hillary Clinton’s experience of being the only woman in the room—again and again—is undeniable. From First Lady to Senator to Secretary of State to first presidential candidate from a major party, she’s absorbed criticism that male counterparts never would. She once said, “If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle.” Behind the sarcasm was a deeper truth: being a woman in politics means being scrutinized at every turn.

Strategies for Thriving, Not Just Surviving

Here’s what we can learn from these women—and what every trailblazer should keep in her toolbox:

1. Build a Support Network Outside the Room

When you’re the only one in the room, make sure you’re not the only one in your life. Find your mentors, sister circle, and peer advisors—people who understand your fight and remind you you’re not crazy.

2. Don’t Let the Room Define You

Walk in with your values anchored and your vision clear. You’re not there to blend in. You’re there to change the tone. Own your perspective—it’s exactly what the room has been missing.

3. Use Your Platform to Lift Others

Bethune. Perkins. Albright. All of them made it a point to hold the door open for the next woman. You don’t have to be perfect. Just be visible—and extend a hand when you can.

4. Name the Bias—Then Navigate It Strategically

Yes, you may face assumptions, interruptions, or invisible standards. You don’t have to internalize them—but recognizing them helps you choose your response instead of reacting in the moment.

5. Celebrate the Win, Even When It’s Small

Being the first means paving a road that didn’t exist before. That’s exhausting. Give yourself permission to rest, recharge, and be proud. You’re changing systems by showing up.

Final Word: You Belong Here

To every woman who’s ever looked around and thought, Why am I the only one here?—know this:

You’re not alone. You’re not an accident. You’re not a placeholder.

You’re a blueprint.

Keep going.

Your Voice Called – It Wants A Seat At The Leadership Table

If you want to become a better leader, start with your voice.

Not your “radio voice” or a rehearsed stage persona—but the real, resonant voice that emerges when you speak with clarity, conviction, and purpose. Because every time you speak—whether you’re giving a presentation, sharing an idea in a meeting, or just weighing in during a hallway chat—you’re leading.

That’s the core message we explored at the Arizona Municipal Clerks Institute this March: Speaking *is* leadership. And here’s why that connection matters more than ever.

A Speaker *Is* a Leader

We tend to separate “public speaking” from “leadership,” as if one happens in conference rooms and the other behind podiums. But leadership is communication in motion. Every time you speak, you influence: decisions, direction, culture. Your tone, timing, and truthfulness shape how people engage with your vision.

Great leaders don’t just issue directives—they connect. And that connection is built through voice.

Why Speaking Equals Leading

Let’s break it down:

🗣 1. Your Words Influence
From the boardroom to the break room, your words set a tone. Purposeful communication inspires trust and guides action. It’s not about being polished—it’s about being clear, grounded, and intentional.

🎯 2. People Judge Leaders by Their Voice
Like it or not, people assess your competence based on how you speak. A great idea, poorly communicated, will fall flat. But confidence, clarity, and conviction? That gets buy-in.

🌉 3. Speaking Is the Bridge Between Vision and Action
You may have a compelling vision—but unless you can share it in a way that moves people, it won’t go anywhere. Public speaking turns strategy into momentum.

🧭 4. Poor Communication Derails Leadership
Confusion, hesitation, disengagement—all symptoms of vague or absent communication. Leadership thrives on clarity. And clarity requires courage and effort.

💗 5. Speaking Well Shows You Care
People can feel it when a leader speaks from the heart. Empathy, storytelling, listening—these aren’t soft skills. They’re power tools for building trust and inspiring action.

Your Leadership Voice: What’s Your Style?

You don’t need to be a “natural” speaker. But you *do* need to know your voice—and grow it.

There are four distinct “voices of leadership”. Which one feels most like you?

– 🧠 The Teacher – You simplify, explain, and guide.
– 🔥 The Motivator – You energize and uplift.
– 💬 The Storyteller – You connect through real-life narratives.
– 🌟 The Visionary – You inspire with the big picture.

We all have a dominant voice—but developing the others makes us more flexible, compelling leaders.

Overcoming the Fear of Speaking

Yes, public speaking still ranks high on the fear charts. But fear is just excitement without direction. You can channel it:

– Reframe nerves as energy
– Visualize success before speaking
– Use grounding tools like power poses and affirmations (“I am a leader when I speak.”)
– Practice, practice, practice

Final Thoughts: Speak Easy, Speak Well

At the end of the day, speaking well isn’t about sounding smart. It’s about making people feel seen, understood, and inspired to act.

As Maya Angelou said, “People will forget what you said… but they’ll never forget how you made them feel.”

So next time you speak—whether to a packed room or a single colleague—remember: you’re not just talking.

You’re leading.

When the Ranks Close Against You: What the Firing of Vice Admiral Chatfield Means for Women in the Military

Yesterday, Vice Admiral Shoshana Chatfield was relieved of her command without public explanation. No charges. No scandal. No official rationale. Just one more highly accomplished, barrier-breaking woman pushed out of leadership in what increasingly looks like a quiet purge.

If this sounds familiar, it’s because it is. Just months ago, Admiral Lisa Franchetti—who was on track to become the first woman to lead the U.S. Navy—was passed over for the top job in favor of a man with far less operational experience. And now, another pioneering woman in uniform is shown the door, with nothing but silence and speculation left in her wake. These actions have left the military without a single woman in a four-star general or admiral leadership position, despite women constituting approximately 17.5% of the active-duty force, totaling nearly 229,000 members. In the Navy, women make up around 20.9% of active-duty officers.

We’re told to believe this isn’t about gender. That it’s not political. That it’s just business as usual.

But we know better.

For women watching from inside the ranks—and for young women thinking about bringing their talents to the military—this moment sends a clear and chilling message: No matter how decorated you are, how hard you work, how many glass ceilings you shatter, you can still be cut loose without explanation or acknowledgment.

This is bigger than one decision. It’s part of a larger pattern—a rollback of decades of progress, a targeting of leaders associated with DEI (diversity, equity, inclusion), and a deliberate reshaping of what leadership looks like in the armed forces. When Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth took the reins, some feared what a Fox News-informed military policy might look like. Now, those fears are beginning to feel like reality.

If Secretary Hegseth is sincere about strengthening the military, I have a recommendation for his reading list: Shoot Like a Girl by Mary Jennings Hegar. It’s the story of a combat pilot who was shot down and left behind by her male wingman—a woman who had to sue the Department of Defense for the right to serve equally, and who still risked her life for her country. Senator John McCain called her “an American patriot whose courage and determination will have a lasting impact on the future of our Armed Forces and the nation.”

Hegar’s story is one of many. And yet, women are being asked—once again—to fight the same battles we thought we’d already won.

So what does this mean for talented young women with leadership potential and a deep desire to serve their country?

It means we need to think strategically.

Yes, the military has been one of the most enduring ladders of social and economic mobility in America. And yes, it still produces extraordinary leaders. But if the message from the top is that women are expendable, overlooked, or unwelcome, then maybe it’s time we help these women find new places to lead. New platforms. New missions. New uniforms—ones not camouflaged in silence or stripped of value.

Because here’s what I know: The talent is real. The drive is unmatched. And the leadership potential of these women? It’s unstoppable.

If the military won’t celebrate it, we will.

So to every young woman wondering what this means for her future: Don’t doubt your power. Don’t shrink your ambition. And don’t let outdated institutions determine your worth.

There are many ways to serve your country, to lead with integrity, and to stand out as the force of change you were meant to be.

Even if you never set foot on a battlefield.